Archive for the The CW Category

Sunday’s TV Picks

Posted in ABC, CBS, Film, FOX, Humor, NBC, The CW, TV with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 30, 2008 by sgottahurt

Let’s begin with an apology.  With the hectsticity that is Thanksgiving weekend (yes, hectsticity is a made up word, but it works, right?), the opportunity to cover Saturday’s TV picks fell to the waist-side (pun intended).  So without further adieu, here’s tonight’s TV selections:

8pm – If you’re watching the football game on NBC, then none of this matters.  If you’re not, it’s a toss-up bewteen the Emmy award-winning Amazing Race on CBS and the tear-jerking Extreme Makeover: Home Edition on ABC.  I dare you to watch a commerical for Home Makeover and not have your eyes water up.  And besides that, I think the show’s name should get a makeover to simply Home Makeover.  Extreme is so blase, and also to note, it was a spin-off of a crappy show about plastic surgery.  It wasn’t quite as bad as The Swan, but what is?  (Answer: MTV’s I Want a Famous Face, natch)

9pm – Hmmm…. a lot of tough match-ups here.  A rerun of Fox’s Family Guy or a rerun of NBC’s Law & Order: SVU?  Then there’s also a new episode of ABC’s Desperate Housewives or a new episode of CBS’s Cold Case?  Turn on the remainder of the Bears vs. Vikings game, or else you’re left with Steve Irwin vs. the CIA (Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course on the CW).

10pm – Go with The Unit on CBS and watch President Palmer do something other than hock Allstate.  Or just finish watching the game.

Pre-Annoying Eva Longoria

Pre-Annoying Eva Longoria

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Friday’s TV Picks

Posted in ABC, CBS, Film, FOX, Humor, MyNetwork, NBC, The CW, TV with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 28, 2008 by sgottahurt

8pm – The Incredibles is on NBC, so it’s an easy choice, even though they cut out all the sex and nudity for broadcast tv, which is what made it so awesome.  What?  Oh, I’m thinking of The Inbedibles.  As they say in Canada, “Sorry!”  (Emphasis on the “o.”)

9pm – What are you still reading for?  There’s nothing else worth watching except The Incredibles!  Anyone that might enjoy the subtle homoeroticism of WWE Friday Night SmackDown on MyNetwork might be dazzled by the gayness that is The Polar Express on ABC, so there’s a conundrum for those folks at 8pm.  But if you like Chris Rock (The CW), Jack Black (Fox), or Jennifer Love Hewitt’s tits (CBS), your path has already been chosen.  There is no swaying you.

10:30pm – After The Incredibles, you can stay tuned and catch the second half of The Office’s season opener (which is a standalone episode), or if you’re a Hollywood whackjob like Madonna or (let’s be honest) Angelina Jolie, you can flip over to ABC and watch the second half of 20/20 – it’s about adopting foreign babies.  If you can’t stick foreign objects in places they don’t belong, why bother?

Once upon a time...

Once upon a time...

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Thanksgiving Day’s TV Picks

Posted in ABC, CBS, Film, FOX, Humor, The CW, TV with tags , , , , , , , on November 27, 2008 by sgottahurt

8pm – Am I having deja vu?  ABC is playing A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving again in case you missed it or didn’t get enough with your first helping.  I’ll be watching the Survivor special on CBS, even though that will probably be lame.  Behind-the-scenes footage would be so much better if they showed the crew giving scripts to cast members… how else can you explain Bob’s fessing up his fake immunity idol to Sugar?  If neither of these are your cup of cranberry sauce, Chloe apparently has developed powers on The CW’s Smallville.

9pm – You can watch the last half of Click on Fox.  Adam Sandler’s life journey is about as melodramatic as Derek and Meredith’s love story on ABC’s Grey’s Anatomy.  Who am I kidding?  By 9pm, everyone should be passed out from the tryptophan.

10pm – Zzzzzzz….

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Tuesday’s TV Picked Scabs

Posted in ABC, CBS, Film, FOX, Humor, MyNetwork, NBC, The CW, TV with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 19, 2008 by sgottahurt

8pm – Fox’s House – Inspector Gadget gets the problem patient.  He crumbles up and tosses the message and everyone blows up.  Penny and Brain help Gadget solve the case!  Isn’t that how it always goes?

8pm – The CW’s 90210 – Wah, wah!  Catfight!  Underage sex!  Cameo!

8pm – CBS’ NCIS – Isn’t this that CSI show with the guy from Summer School?  Chainsaw rocks!

9pm – ABC’s Dancing With the Stars Results Show – Aretha Franklin, Leona Lewis, John Legend, and Julianne Hough sang… people danced… the producers successfully strung out a five-minute show into an hour (two hours if you count the hour recap before this hour)… and Cody Linley’s going home (I’ll miss you Julianne!)…

9pm – Fox’s Fringe – I’m waiting for the DVD of this show… if it gets a second season.  It’s Fox, so you know I’m right about trying not to get hooked on something they’ll cancel.  Assholes.

9pm – MyNetwork’s Jail – Back-to-back episodes that kind of act as a “Where are they now?” for former guests of Jerry Springer, People’s Court, and Cheaters.

10pm – NBC’s Law & Order: SVU – Didn’t that one dude play Casey Jones in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Movie?  No?  Well, I know for a fact Ice-T played a mutant kangaroo.

10pm – ABC’s Eli Stone – Real quick Jonny Lee Miller facts:

  • Played Zero Cool in Hackers
  • Played Sick Boy in Trainspotting
  • Was married to Angelina Jolie
  • Now stars opposite Natasha Henstridge (who was super hot in Species, which was why she had to keep taking off her clothes) and the cute-as-a-button, Julie Gonzalo.  ‘Nuff said!
Julie Gonzalo

Julie Gonzalo

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Monday’s TV Anti-Picks

Posted in Humor, MyNetwork, NBC, The CW, TV, USA Network with tags , , , , , , , , on November 17, 2008 by sgottahurt

Since the normal guy that writes these picks isn’t doing his share, I’m going to select the absolute worst decisions to occupy your time between Jeopardy and your local evening news.

8pm – MyNetwork TV is airing a pair of reruns of the most recent remake of The Twilight Zone.  The first episode, “Tagged,” is basically like Heroes’ arc about Isaac the Painter.  An artist paints a portrait of his own demise… Oooh, scary!  The second one could be a Heroes storyline. too, which leads us perfectly into…

9pm – You thought I was going to put Heroes, but there’s something actually worse – One Tree Hill.  I didn’t even know that show was still on, to be honest.  Check it out on the CW.

10pm – I wanted to go with the series singing its swan song – My Own Worst Enemy, but I’d rather suggest watching WWE Monday Night RAW on the USA Network.  It starts at 9, so if you tune in an hour late, you’ll be totally lost!

NOTE: If you are a fan of any of these shows, my deepest condolences.  It must be hard having your mother still feed and bathe you.

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