Archive for December 7, 2008

Survivor Recap And Review: What About Bob?

Posted in CBS, Humor with tags , , on December 7, 2008 by sgottahurt

Doesn’t anyone know how to play this game anymore?

So on this past week’s Survivor, Bob tried to pull a quick one which failed, but in the grand scheme of things, he might have inadvertantly improved his situation.

Basically, he fashioned another immunity idol (where is he getting all those beads?), and hoped to use it to sway everyone to vote Matty out and save Corinne.  Both he and Corinne told Kenny this plan, thinking Kenny could get Crystal to go along with the idea, which he could and would, but the backfire was a loud one coming.

The inherent flaw in the plan is this: the idol isn’t real.  Of course, Kenny would try to flush it out.  He’s dumb, but not stupid.  Mor-on that in a second.  Why-oh-why did Bob and Corinne think he would let her keep it.  One alternative could have included Bob telling Kenny he had the allegedly tossed idol, and he would swear to let him use it if needed, under the condition that he would vote Matty out.  It might not have worked, but it’s a better plan than the one they went with.

Here’s where I think Kenny made a fatal flaw: if the idol was real, two votes would have been enough to knock out Matty.  I know he thought it was fool-proof, so what did it matter?  But now the game will/should/must change further. 

This is the way I see it.  Matty probably expected Corinne and Bob’s votes.  Kenny’s he did not.  What Matty (along with Sugar and Bob) needs to realize is Kenny, Crystal, and Susie are the weakest powerhouse ever.  They will not be broken in theory.  Matty should set his sights on Kenny, and to do so he needs to forge an alliance with the teacher and the pin-up girl whom actually has the real immunity idol.

I’ll give huge kudos to Bob if this was his plan all along, but somehow I doubt it.  My conspiracy theory is this: the producers provided him the materials to build fake idols, and the plots to give one to Randy to get in with Sugar and the second to stir the pot up.  What did he get out of it?  The safari walk he went on while at Exile Island.  Why else were there helicopters swooping around to capture the panoramic view of him?

The finale is on December 14th on CBS.  One week to go, then one month until my other island show is back.

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SNL Real-Time Blog

Posted in Humor, NBC with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 7, 2008 by sgottahurt

11:30 – Cold Open: Hillary Clinton, Secretary of State – Yay!  Amy Poehler’s back!  Barack Obama winning slam: check.  Sarah Palin dig: check.  Hillary’s chuckle: check.  Bill: check.  Happy days are here again!

 

11:35 – For John Malkovich’s third time hosting, he read Twas the Night Before Christmas, complete with dark and honest asides, such as descibing how in reality, Santa would burst into flames trying to fly around the world so fast.  Chuckle inducing.

 

11:41 – Gas Right Commercial – 30 Rock (which is loosely based on the idea of SNL) always makes jokes about how they use too many fart jokes in their skits.  Guess what this skit’s about.

 

11:45 – Work Birthday Party – Let me start by saying this: Kristen Wiig is like in every skit.  So we’ll began the Wiig Counter at 1.  In this one, she plays the hot bimbo in the office that loses her sex appeal bit by bit.  I’ll finish by saying this: her comedy chops improve on a weekly basis.  She’s come a long way since the Joe Schmo Show.

 

11:52 – Obama Cool Cat Ad – He keeps it cool.  Funny.  Liked this one a lot.

 

11:57 – La Rivista Della Televisione – Malkovich is on an Italian talk show and can’t speak it.  Simple, but good.  New guy whose name I don’t know made me laugh in this one.

 

12:02 – Digital Short: Virgania Horsen’s Pony Express – Kristen goes solo on this short, if you don’t count the guest appearances by herself.  Wiig Counter: 2 (not counting multiple Wiigs)

 

12:04 – Christmas Twins – I’ve never seen a calculator joke go on for so long, but somehow it still kinda works… mostly because it’s short.

 

12:11 – T.I.’s first song.  I’m indifferent.

 

12:17 – Weekend Update – Again, yay Amy!  Plaxico Burress (Kenan Thompson) warns about the dangers of wearing sweatpants and concealing guns.  Boy George (Fred Armison) couldn’t keep a straight face (no pun intended).  And a different nine-year old boy has better tips on getting girls – like using cocaine.

 

12:34 – Lost Works of Judy Blume: Gertie – Malkovich plays Gertie, the crazy mutant girl that has her period for three months, foams at the mouth and blacks out when she thinks of cute boys, and is growing a tail… Overall, a pretty funny skit about a pretty ugly girl.  Kenan Thompson’s song even made me smile.  Wiig Counter: 3, Abby Elliott Counter: 1  😦

 

12:42 – Digital Short: Jizz in my Pants – Molly Sims, Jamie Lynn Sigler, and Justin Timberlake guest star in  the second great short that’s sure to be a classic… it may not reach Lazy Sunday or Dick in a Box heights, but at least the level of Natalie Portman’s rap and Iran So Far.  Jorma Taccone is the other Dude.

 

12:49 – Rocking hip hop by T.I.  I kinda like it.

 

12:54 – Dangerous Liaison Redux: J’accuzzi – French aristocrats in a hot tub.  Throw away final skit that isn’t awful, but not super funny.  J’silly.

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